AFanWhatNow?
by TofuPirate
Summary: What would happen if our favorite characters just so happened to stumble upon some fanfiction?
1. A Code Even A Genius Can't Crack

**Title: **A-Fan-What-Now?

**Rating: **T

**Summary:** What would happen if our favorite characters just so happened to stumble upon some fanfiction?

**Disclaimer:** If you recognize it, I don't own it, unfortunately.

**A/N:** First attempt at humor. Don't laugh TOO much at me if it stinks. Also... all of the fanfics that I have them reading... are complete and total figments of my imagination. I'm not trying to offend anyone who may have written a fiction like it. I'm just rather being the total odd-ball that I am... and creating a fic that I'm hoping will entertain me... and hopefully make sense to the rest of the world.

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**Chapter 1 - **A Code Even A Genius Can't Crack.

It was a day like any other day at the Behaviourial Analysis Unit in Quantico, Virginia. Actually, it was a rather slow day case-wise, but no body was really complaining. Most– if not all– of the case that reached the BAU were tragic in their own way, and those types of things tend to build up inside of a person.

So there they were... with absolutely nothing to do, sitting at their individual desks, flipping though papers looking for something that they could use to busy themselves. But of course this was all about to change...

"I've found the greatest thing on the planet!" the sound of Garcia's voice could be heard by pretty much everyone in the building as she ran in to get the attention of the members of the team.

At first everyone was hesitant to follow – especially Gideon, after the last time he spent "in the room with the screens" as he so put it. However, she was remained persistent and finally got them to follow her until they reached her computer.

"All right, what did you find? I've got to get back to work," Special Agent Aaron Hotchner stated, even though he was lying. He was pretty much as bored as the rest of them because he too had nothing to do.

Garcia then proceeded to explain she'd just stumbled upon a website that featured something called "Fan Fiction", and that it just so happened to feature a section all about the BAU team. None of them really understood it, and in fact, about half of them were frightened at the idea that someone out there would be writing about them... but the idea still intrigued them, so they stood and watched as Garcia found one she thought would be good and brought it up on the screen.

"Let's see, this one's called... _Da Genius Boi_," Garcia read out loud, while the rest of them seemed to look puzzled. The words were written in an odd manner. However, Garcia seemed to laugh at this, "Hey, Reid, I think this one is about you!"

Reid's face turned a slight shade of red, before he decided to take hold of the mouse to scroll down and read the story. After a few minutes of this, he began to squint his eyes and shake his head at the screen.

"I can't understand a word of this. It appears to be in another language that I've never heard... or read about before," he finally stated out loud, but it was like admitting defeat, there'd never been anything he didn't know before now.

Special Agent Derek Morgan began to laugh, and moved closer to the screen so he could take a stab at reading what Reid had not been able to.

"_It wuz a vry cold & dark day wen ried went 2 wurk,"_ Morgan squinted his eyes as he read the screen. He wasn't having much more luck then Reid was, but nonetheless, Morgan continued, "_He lokked liek crap cuz he'd bin up liek all nite cuz he wuz tryin' out dis nu intenet dating thang, but it wuznt werkin... N e wayz, morgin coms over & iz all liek 'wot wer u doin last nite', & ried iz all liek 'itz nun ov ur busniss! Go 2 hell! So den ried runs out ov da room & in2 da brekroom & sees ell & gidien makin out... so hes all WTF & they r all 'we wuznt doin n e thin! & ten hotch coms in & tells them 2 shut up & get bak 2 wurk cuz he's liek rlly evil. "_

Morgan shook his head, he wasn't understanding a word of what he was reading. Maybe it really _was_ in another language.

They all turned to Garcia, in hopes that maybe she understood this foreign language. She gave them her usual smile, and informed them that there wasn't anything on the computer that she couldn't figure out.

"I've been reading a few of these, and if you stick some vowels in here and there, and read really closely, you can understand exactly what they are saying," Garcia explained, and then proceeded to "translate" what they had just read.

A smile formed on Special Agent Elle Greenaway's face. "I guess Hotch is the evil guy in this story," she laughed as everyone turned to look at Agent Hotchner.

"Hey, he's not the one with Gideon in the break room. I don't think the boyfriend is going to be too happy about this one, Elle," Morgan teased.

"Who would write something like this?" Reid questioned, but Garcia quickly informed him that it was just a story, and that they shouldn't get too worked up about it. It was just some person from cyberspace trying to have a little fun and kill some time.

Reid shook his head.

"Maybe we should just read another one..." Garcia stated as she pressed the "back" button on the browser and searched for another title that caught her eye.

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**A/N: **Sorry about the "chat-speak" and hopefully you could understand it. It was kind of hard to write, seeing as I don't ever allow myself to type using it. Anyway... if you'd like, you can leave me a review:) 


	2. Let’s Give Them Something to Talk About

**Chapter 2 - **Let's Give Them Something to Talk About. How About Death?

Everyone seemed at least the tad bit uneasy as Garcia scanned through a list of potential stories to read next. Just the thought of someone writing a story about – them, was the slightest bit unsettling. However, Garcia was not about ready to let any of them leave unless they actually had a case or work to do.

"Well, this looks like a good one," she smiled, "_Death to Reid."_

Reid's eyes grew wide. "Death?"

It seemed that Morgan wasn't concerned about the word "Death" in the title of the story, but rather with the notion that most of the stories seemed to be centered around young Spencer Reid. It was highly unfair in his eyes. Why couldn't some highly obsessed person write a story about him? He laughed at himself inwardly for even thinking that, and turned his attention over to Garcia, who was about to start reading the next fanfiction.

"All right, this one seems to be in English, so I'll just read it out loud for you," Garcia began, as she cleared her throat and started to read, "_I remember was hearing the whooshing sound of the knife, being able to see the man coming, and the coppery scent of blood... it was everywhere. I froze. I felt as if my muscles had turned into stone and were disabling me from moving– even the slightest bit. I watched in horror as Hotch and Gideon pulled out their guns and started to fire at the attacker, the unsub we'd be hunting. If anyone had ever said this job was easy, I'd have to call them a liar._

_I remember feeling dizzy – really dizzy – and maybe even a little sick to my stomach. There was blood everywhere, and it chilled me to the bone knowing where that blood came from. Knowing that it was the blood of my friend that was splattered across the pavement, like a bucket of spilled paint._

_I felt my legs turn to jelly, and I could no longer support my own weight. I heard the gun shots cease, so I assumed that the attacker had been taken down. I fell onto the ground and stared at the sky for a moment or two until I couldn't keep my eyes open anymore. This was a dream... it had to be a dream. _

_Maybe I was unconscious, no, I don't think I was. I just didn't want to open my eyes to the world. Not after what had just happened, so I laid there and listened. I heard the sound of footsteps rushing in the direction of where I assumed Reid was laying, it must have been Gideon, because I could hear the sound of Hotch's voice above me._

'_Morgan!'_

'_I'm f-f-fine,' I managed to say. I wanted to ask if Reid was okay, but I couldn't bring myself to. I feared that Hotch was going to tell me that he was already dead._

_I heard the sound of the ambulance arriving, and I finally found the strength inside of me to sit up. I remember shaking... I was shaking badly..._

_The only thing that was running through my mind was the fact that I should have done something. I should have gone over to help him, I should have pulled out my gun sooner, I should have shot the bastard before he had the chance to pull the knife on Reid."_

Garcia paused when she heard the sound of a sniffle in the background. Everyone turned to see who it was, and sure enough, they saw the unit liaison, Jennifer Jareau, with a few tears in her eyes.

"What?" she asked when she noticed that everyone was staring at her, "I came down here to find out where everyone was, and I heard Garcia reading that... it was kind of sad!"

"Okay, keep reading!" Elle said anxiously, obviously in a state of suspense. She wanted to know what was going to happen next.

Garcia nodded and then turned her attention back to the screen and began reading again.

"_One of the paramedics came over to me a few moments later, asking me if I was all right. I wanted to tell them to take care of Reid... I was fine. He was the one that needed to be looked after. He was the one that had just gotten stabbed. However, I couldn't force my brain to allow the words to come out. My lips moved, but made no sound._

'_This one is in shock. We'd better take him back to the hospital too.'_

_I kept shaking my head. I was fine and I didn't want to go to the hospital. However, it didn't really matter, they seemed to think that I needed to go."_

Garcia stopped reading for a moment and scrolled down... muttering something about pointless filler. She (and everyone else in the room) wanted to get to the part where they found out about Reid... even though the title pretty much gave that away.

"Ahh, here we go," she stated as she found a section she felt was worth reading out loud, "_Hotch had a somber look upon his face when he approached me. I knew exactly what he was going to say._

'_Derek...'_

_I knew it was bad news, I just wanted to close my eyes and pretend it wasn't happening. Reid wasn't gone. He just wasn't, he couldn't be._

_Hotch explained that the paramedics did everything they could to try and save Reid's life... but there had just been too much damage, it would have taken a miracle to reverse it, and they just didn't have enough time. They'd lost him..."_

As he listened to Garcia read, Reid's face was drained of all color. He felt a cold sweat coming on, just like the kind one gets after having a nightmare in which they envision their own death.

"You mean I'm _dead_?" Reid asked, almost horrified at the thought that there was someone out there that would actually write a story where he was stabbed... and killed, "Who would write this? Who writes this stuff? Wait... Morgan... are you crying?"

Everyone turned to look at the agent who was wiping the saline liquid from his eyes.

"No," he quickly replied, "I have something in my eye. Eyelash or something... I can't seem to get it out."

Of course, he was downright lying, it had, in fact, been tears in his eyes. But at least he'd managed to suppress the urge to run over to Reid, throw his arms around him and cry out, 'You're never allowed to die on us, man!'

Garcia chuckled and winked, "Of course, hot stuff, eyelash. So, who's up for another fanfiction?"

Reid quickly opposed. I guess the idea that there were people out there... writing stories that depicted his death was the slightest bit unsettling for him. He'd rather sit at his desk and pointless ruffle through papers, then hear another fan fiction.

"Yes, we should probably get back to work," the rest of the team pointed out.

"Oh come on. Just one more, it's not like we've got anything else to do!" Garcia pleaded, not wanting to lose her audience.

Reid's expression resembled that of a child who'd just been told there was a monster in their closet. He didn't want to hear any more fanfiction, and especially any more that involved him being stabbed.

"Nuh uh. Count me out," he pouted, shaking his head... again, much like a child.

However, Garcia was not going to be this easily beaten, and quickly searched for something else to read. After a few moments, she smiled.

"Look, I'll read this one. You need not worry, Reid. This one's about Hotch."

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**A/N:** I hope this chapter didn't stink too horribly. I had something tell me it would be rather interesting to toy with the idea of Reid hearing a fanfiction which involved him being killed. Only because I'm such a dark-fiction person myself. Anyways... if this chapter didn't completely make you think "Wow... what the heck does this kid think she's writing" then maybe leave a review? Only if you'd like:) 


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